Watching fingernails grow

I can go for weeks without thinking about my fingernails.а Until the day I notice that they’re clacking away like claws when I’m tapping on my keyboard (writing blogs, of course). I’ll also notice them when I’m trying to pry the lid off a can or do anything requiring fine fingertip motor skills!а Then I know it’s time to get out the nail file.

I just did the needful again this week, and it seemed like I’d done it not so long ago. I mean, just how fast do fingernails grow? Then I thought of the saying: “It’s like watching grass grow.”а Which raised the question:а Which takes longer to grow – fingernails or grass? Are you with me so far?

So I went online to do a little research, and discovered a couple of things.

First, no source I could find seems to care exactly how long it takes to grow an inch of grass. They’ll tell you how climatic conditions will affect growth rates depending on the type of grass, but their research was terribly disappointing because no one got down to the nitty gritty. How long does it take?а The fingernail experts though, bless their little scientific hearts, had done their due diligence.а According to one source, on average, fingernails grow about 0.02 inches a week, which works out to roughly an inch a year – about the same pace that continents move, they went on to say.а That’s REALLY SLOW, but then again, continents are REALLY BIG.а I guess it’s all relative.а

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Oh, and just to complete the report, they said that toenails grow between a quarter and half as much as fingernails.а Thank God.а It’s getting harder and harder to reach them.

By the way, I don’t mean to vilify the practice of cultivating long fingernails, although it does take a good deal of attention and care, and a certain degree of vanity. I should know. I used to do it.а This was back in my days as a professional (the day job type) on Bishop Street (Honolulu’s downtown business district), when I would see my manicurist every two weeks to have my nails shaped, buffed, and polished in brilliant shades of red.а It was part of the package.а

I work out of my home office now, which means no “career” clothes, no makeup, and absolutely no long, painted nails – fingers or toes!а And another thing – I really don’t care how long it takes grass to grow.

а

Something else I learned.

Nails don’t grow after you die.

I love creepy facts.


(Rerun of an 8/27/09 blog.)

ай Maya Leland 2014